I Shall Leave You With This…

I write this post with a heavy heart and watery eyes. I will try to only shed a couple of tears, but I can’t promise anything.

On a dreary Sunday in October of 2013, while drinking beautifully crafted beers, I asked LJ if he wanted to come across the world with me. I was talking seriously about volunteering abroad for a summer before starting graduate school and I wanted to get away and explore the world before that happened. I wasn’t sure what my plan was but I wanted him to be apart of it. It’s hard to believe that one decision can be so life changing. After we decided our plan to flee to Asia was a genius one, time flew by, and before we knew it, it was time to pack up our things and move.

Eight months ago, we crossed our fingers and began a journey of the unknown. We hopped on that plane, with so many question marks still left in the air. What will our village be like? How much English do the students know? What grades am I teaching? Will we have enough money? Where will we live after Thailand? Will people know enough English to get by? Where will we travel to? Are LJ and I going to kill each other? Am I totally crazy for doing this?! As travelling has taught me more than anything, everything will turn out to be just fine…better than fine, actually quite amazing.

We adjusted to teaching and we made other American, teacher friends in other towns. We became close with our Thai co-workers and they taught us so many things that are uniquely Thai; from the food, to the ceremonies, to the religious practices, to shopping markets, to food markets, to eating on the floor, to eating with chop-sticks; they showed us the ropes and taught us how to survive as foreigners living in Thailand. We will be forever grateful for that.

As time went on we began to notice a familiar feeling of routine and things loosing their luster; same old lady we buy our lunch from, same old instant coffee every morning, same old classes who behave like cracked-out monkeys, same old guy in town who tries to converse despite knowing no English, same old 7/11, same old mosquitoes that flood our bathroom, same old music blaring from the neighbors house, same old bed frame that’s precariously duck-taped together, same old, same old. Before we knew it though, things started to shift and we could feel our time in town was coming to an end. We began anticipating our travels and trying to savor each and every moment in our town. How was it that we were done teaching and living in Thailand? To ease the disbelief that our time was up, we soaked it all up like a thirsty sponge. We gave an extra enthusiastic wave and smile to that same old lady who makes our lunch, we drank one too many instant coffees, and I taught those little cracked-out monkeys the best that I could. I never made much headway with the guy who can’t speak English but we did exchange an uncomfortable amount of smiles; I stood in front of the air conditioning in that 7/11 more times than I’d like to admit and we got damn good at killing mosquitoes while taking showers. Sometimes we’d scream at the music coming from our neighbors house and then laugh about how crazy we’d become and on our final morning I stood next to that broke-ass bed frame and  said with pride, “I survived.” We said our final goodbyes and it was as if we were saying goodbye to family. Their unconditional generosity is one that makes Thai culture famous and is a quality that made our relationship feel family-like. People who bring you dinner without accepting money; people who invite you to the house they grew up in and to meet their parents; people who offer you their old clothes and tell you that you’re beautiful in them; people who seemingly always have an open heart and offer whatever they have to make your life better. I’ve come to see that people all over the world have kind eyes and beautiful hearts and the Thai people we came to know and love were no exception.

We packed our bags and started our journey of 14 cities, 5 countries, in 2 months. We traveled to India where we had a serious worldview wake up call. We experienced things that reflected the consequences of extreme poverty and overpopulation. We saw families covering the sidewalks, as women cradled their children, because they didn’t have a place to call home. We realized, although outlawed, the caste system is still widely used and gender equality is not really a thing. Women did not hold jobs in the work place, but only in the fields. I barely interacted with Indian women because most times they were no where to be found. Although our experience left us shaken at times, it was an experience we wouldn’t change for anything. We truly feel as if we understand the world just a little bit better after being in India, and that’s a lot to gain in only 10 days. Next stop was Nepal. We explored the beautiful countryside by taking a short trek. We saw the Himalayas at sunrise and we got a shot of adrenaline by white water rafting at the epicenter of the earthquake. We left Kathmandu 12 hours  before the devastating 7.9 earthquake hit and destroyed buildings, families, and entire villages. Nepal will be forever in our hearts because of its rare beauty which undoubtedly makes the world a more spectacular place to explore.

Next stop, Thailand with Lori and Larry. If felt so good to be back in familiar territory. When you have so little to hold on to in terms of comfort, its nice to be able to say in the native language, ” thank you, please, can I have…, how much is this….”. To understand they only have tiny pink napkins in restaurants and that you have to remember to say, “no sugar” and “no fish sauce!”. Showing Lori and Larry the ropes was a lot of fun and I hope they made memories that will make them laugh and smile. Sweating when we walked out the door; eating the smallest tapas known to man; confusing ” hello” with “thank you”; overlooking Chiang Mai from the mountainside; swimming with elephants; boat rides through the islands; colorful snorkeling; that sassy Russian lady who stole Lori’s towel!

We packed up our bags one last time and headed to Cambodia. We had such an unexpectedly moving experience there. To learn about the torture and genocide that occurred in the 1970s made our hearts hurt. It made us reflect on the travesties that haunt world history and how it shapes a nation. How it makes people resilient and come together but also how difficult it is to rebuild a country after such devastation. Cambodia has been through a lot and from what we saw of the country today, they are doing quite well for being so new. The people are kind and helpful and tourism continues to grow. Vietnam was filled with both bustling city life and beautiful island wonders. Saigon has come a long way from what it looked like during the Vietnam War and is quite the exciting metropolis. There are high rises, shops, markets, and restaurants. We went to fascinating museums regarding the Vietnam War and ancient, traditional medicine. We ended our trip in a fascinating place: Cat Ba Island. Its beauty astounded us and as we looked out from our hotel balcony we reflected on how lucky we’ve been. We ate dinner overlooking the sunset and taking about the past eight months. We reminisced about funny mishaps and romantic sunrises and sunsets. We laughed about how frustrating teaching could feel and how unusual it was to work in a place so relaxed. We joked that we never want to live out of a backpack again and that we’ve probably been exuding an oder for the past 2 months. As the sun disappeared and we were left talking in the dark, we both couldn’t help but feel sad. We kept repeating ourselves with, ” I can’t believe we did that…”, ” I can’t believe we saw that…”, “I can’t believe its over…”.

As life moves on and the months and years pass by, its not always a clear time for reflection. Little milestones don’t feel like much when you’re always working toward the next big thing and before you know it, you never stopped to think about what you’ve learned. This week has been a painfully obvious time to reflect about our lives and so that’s what we’ve done. So much so, that I hope to not reflect about anything for at least 6 months (only kidding). We’ve asked ourselves the big questions…what did we get out of this? What did we learn? Are we better people than we were before? Although these are pretty impossible questions to answer, we feel that all of our experiences leave us spewing out so many answers to these questions it’s hard to narrow it down.

What did we get out of this?

Experience. We got so much damn experience I can’t even begin to share it all. We found ourselves in situations that we couldn’t have imagined in our wildest dreams and we found ourselves in situations that we dreamed to experience. There are so many things that we could have never experienced in America and were also uniquely Asian. We had many experiences that are special to this side of the world and therefore helped us appreciate and understand Asian societies better. We filed away so many different, wild, and exciting experiences into our “experience catalog of life” that I’d say I’m at least 5 years older than I was when I left!

What did we learn?

Oh boy…..maybe we learned a lot, maybe we learned nothing at all? Sometimes I’d feel like I was learning the same idea over and over again but just in a different setting. With that being said, I’ll try to convey some things I think we may have learned.

1. The world is so beautiful. Seriously, it’s an absolutely gorgeous blue and green planet. Before coming to Asia, I dreamed of seeming some amazing temples and a breathtaking Thai island. We saw so much more than that. Sometimes the beauty would be unexpected and sometimes it would be planned. Sometimes we’d find beauty in something that the other person wouldn’t. We found beauty in ancient structures and newly built Buddhist and Hindu temples. We saw beauty in the filth of The Ganges river and the dead bodies that were being carried through the streets. We found the most beautiful sights though, in what nature had to offer. The luscious jungles and high mountain peaks. The hikes that made your knees shaky only to lead you to the most beautiful view in the world. The lakes, oceans, bays, and seas that gave you such a real sense of how massive the world is and as you drink your margarita you remember that you’re just a small speck in time. The sights we saw were amazing and its inspired us to explore the more immediate beauty in the future. Explore the US and see all of the hidden peaks and valleys that are just in our backyard.

2. People are the same. This is not something new that we learned but it was an idea that we learned over and over while traveling to so many different places. To live in a small village/town of 3-4,000 people in the mountains of Northern Thailand makes you presume that you’ll discover nothing but differences and stark contrasts. What you find is a Thai version of “that guy” who always takes things too far, that woman who dresses a bit too young for her age, and those kids who want nothing more than to watch cartoons and hit their younger brother in the head with the remote. When you visit India, you see opportunists and people hustling for extra cash; selling, cooking, sewing, and crafting something of value. Motivated to have something greater, which is no different than when I used to pick up extra shifts at the hospital. In Nepal, I have a vivid image of two kids who made themselves toys. They took plastic bags and tied them to the end of a long stick and watched them blow in the air, as a big storm was rolling in. Their dad was standing with his buddy and they were throwing rocks, trying to hit the plastic bags. The kids kept saying (what I assume they were saying), “Dad!!! Stop it Dad!!”. In Cambodia, we had to wait at a travel agency for a while, and as we waited I was observing the 30-something guy working. I could tell he was bored and I watched him surf the web; Facebook, the news, and some website filled with memes…not so different than me. In Vietnam, as we ate dinner, we saw a group of guys come in after work and order beers. They talked, laughed, and kept ordering each other “one more”; I have no doubt they talked about their nagging wives, how idiotic their boss is, and bragged a little about their kid making the soccer team. Again, this is not something new we learned, but it felt really good to feel some basic connection half way around the world. To know we share a fundamental understanding of what smiles mean and that we all try and avoid pain. I really believe people are good and travelling has made me understand that not only are we good, but we are all very similar. Certain needs and wants are universal, and sometimes how we spend the day is mirrored halfway around the world.

3. You are you where ever you go. I had a delusional idea that by moving halfway across the world, maybe I’d be different. Not that I wanted to be different, but when you imagine having surroundings that look and feel so different you naturally imagine yourself different as well. This is just not the case. All of your quirks and idiosyncrasies as well as your strengths are all there…right there, they don’t go anywhere. You may act a little stressed and overwhelmed, but its no different than when your stressed and overwhelmed to the same degree at home. You think that when you’re away you’ll grow an affinity to rice and leafy greens. You wont. You’ll still want cheese for every meal and wonder if its 5 o’clock so you can find the nearest wine glass. You think you’ll transcend cultural boundaries and awkwardness and have effortless conversations with locals. You won’t. You’ll repeat yourself in 6 different accents to just find a squat toilet. You think you’ll be as cute and graceful as your Thai co-worker. You wont. You will never know Thai, you will never adjust to tropical weather, your hair will never look like black silk, and you will never be 90lbs. The truth is, I find this comforting. To know you are who you are, despite all of the hills and valleys in life, the challenges and rewards. You still come out as yourself, hopefully a better version but still you.

Are we better people than before?

We’d like to think so, but of course we’d like to think that. We will never know if we’re “better”, but I think we’ve become more well rounded; with a myriad of international experiences, both work and travel. We’ve come to understand the world just a small fraction more than we did before but it leaves us curious to find out more. The world intrigues us now, more than it ever did before. We know what the world’s beauty can offer and that meeting people from all over the world expands small places in your mind that you never knew existed. Meeting that man from Belgium or that traveling mother of 3 from Malaysia; the girls right out of high school from the Netherlands or the family from Utah who now lives in Saudi Arabia. The courageous young woman travelling from China and the sweet grandma and boy from France. All these people opened our minds as well; seeing them interact and hearing their travel stories made us appreciate travel and the people who embark on taking on the world.

So I am sure you’re half way asleep by now, if you’ve made it this far, but I wanted to sincerely thank the people who have continued to read our blog. Writing this blog has been a big part of this experience. It’s helped us reflect and process everything we’ve seen in a more complete way than journaling or jotting down notes; partly because we know people are listening and are therefore travelling with us. To have an audience has been more exciting than I ever expected and without your kind words, I’m not sure we would have kept up with it. In addition, its helped me re-find my appreciation and sense of fulfillment from writing. As I though about writing this final post, a vivid childhood memory came to me. I was probably 6 years old, sitting in our cold, damp basement, while my dad helped me write a personalized letter to Arthur the aardvark. I can’t remember the contents of the letter, but I remember having no doubt that Arthur was going to hear me and through letters that looked more like scribbles, that little aardvark would understand my 6 year old struggle. I sent my heart-felt letter to PBS and unfortunately, I don’t think I ever heard back from Arthur. Although I no longer write to fictional aardvarks, I do write to everyone out there, and I want to say thank you for listening. Thank you for being apart of our journey. Thank you for learning with us and thank you for supporting us.

So, I shall leave you with this. As I write this post on an airplane back to Bangkok, sandwiched between two big men who are sleeping like babies, I am filled with what feels like endless emotion. Mostly gratitude for having had such an experience and awe at how wonderful this planet is. I can’t promise that my travelers-high wisdom has any merit, but I have to encourage everyone out there to keep exploring. The world is wonderful and for now, its the only planet we can call our own. So go out and see it. Meet people who make you wonder and try food that makes you sweat. It makes you appreciate what you have and it connects you to people everywhere. It makes you love your friends and family deeper. If world travel isn’t an option, keep it domestic. If domestic isn’t an option, take a different running route or try some Indian dish you’ve never heard of. You’ll probably be disappointed but that’s all apart of the universal magic. You get knocked down, you get back up, you try things, you fail, you succeed, you laugh about it, you do it again. Keep an open heart and an ever-exploring mind and let yourself discover things you’ve never felt before. In the end, it all comes together to be this magical, perfectly written, little story called “your beautiful life”.

Cambodia & Vietnam

We came, we saw, and we conquered. Well, it was more like melted into a puddle rather than conquered, but as they say  in Thailand, “same, same”. LJ and I travelled to Cambodia for 7 days and then crossed the border into Vietnam, where we spent 8 days. Both Cambodia and Vietnam shared similarities with Thailand, but each country has their own unique flare and culutuaral exerience that is not to be missed. We learned so much about each country’s history becuase it played such a role in what they’ve become today. Both Cambodia and Vietnam experienced painful, country-wide tragedies including, declaring Independence from French colonial rule, being under violent dictatorships, enduring a mass-genocide of the county’s most intelligent citizens, and of course the emotional and physical toll of the Vietnam War. So, again, I will attempt at explaining our experience in two amazing counties but I can’t promise I’ll do it justice.

Cambodia: 

I’ve always considered myself a fan of geography but for some reason I could never remember where Cambodia was. Before we came to SE Asia, there was a 50/50 chance I would say it was a country in Africa. This is to say, I knew little to nothing about Cambodia but what we’ve learned in the last couple of weeks is fascinating; filled with pain, injustice, and eventually restoration. When you’re from a relatively new country that has been maintained as a world-power and is strong and developed, like America, you should consider yourself lucky but it doens’t always make for an interesting history class. Cambodia on the other hand, has endured so much just in the last 40 years. As you can tell, Cambodia’s history became a captivating part of our travels and we took every opportunity to learn about it. I apologize if history bores but I just can’t help myself.

One of the biggest reasons we wanted to come to Cambodia was to see the ever-famous, UNESCO World Heritage Site, Angkor Wat. Angkor is an area that served the Khmer Empire, which was a very powerful and influenctial Empire from the 9th to the 15th centuries. The Khmer Empire occupied present day, Thailand, Laos, Southern Vietnam, and Cambodia. Ultimately, over these 700 years, they made Angkor (today, Siem Reap, Cambodia) their capital city, where they built over one-thousand temples located within forests and around farmland. It is said to be the world’s largest single religious monument, although it does not possess much of a religious feel today. It feels more like you’ve travelled back in time and you’ve entered a video game or alternate universe where spralling Kingdoms exist and nothing else matters but the sandstone palace you are standing in. You walk through small doorways and enter in a new room, and then another, and another until you are lost. We actually got lost in one of the temples, it was so big and maze-like…and that was one of 1,000+ temples that was in a few miles of us. I do not lie when I say it’s amazing and you feel like you’ve just stepped into an Asian version of Game of Thrones. Actually, the movie Lara Croft: Tomb Raider was filmed in one of the temples if that gives you any ideas. If you ever have the chance to go, please do it.

The more recent events of Cambodia’s past touched our heart’s as well. Back to History Class: Khmer Rouges was the ruling party in Cambodia from 1975 to 1979 and they were an offshoot from the Vietnam People’s Army in Northern Vietnam. It was a communist party and the dictator in charge was Pol Pot, who was undoubtedly a paranoid, egotystical psycho. Pol Pot killed an estimated 3 million of the country’s most presigous and intelligent people, making it the one of the world’s largest genoices in history. During this time, 1/4th of the population died by means of the Khmer Rougues genocide. Their goal was to purify the race and restore an agrarian society. They wanted people out of the cities and onto the farm land, with no education and no hope of global progress. Therefore, anyone who had an education or had a job that wasn’t farming was executed; officials, executives, teachers, lawyers, doctors. Things obviously got out of hand and conflicts with communists in Vietnam began to rise. The Khmer Rouguue let paranoia take over, and they started to kill everyone they could find, in fears that the were working for the KGB or the CIA. They had numerous torture camps and “killing fields” all around the country, where they would dig mass graves of over 400 bodies per grave. LJ and I visited a torture camp that was perfectly resotred and also one of the 300 “killing fields” where many murders took place. The Khmer Rougue was detail-orineted and took pictures of everyone before, during, and after their time at the camps. Needless to say, the things we saw made us sick to our stomachs. The pictures, the stories, the cells which you could walk into and stand. The palpable sense of sorrow and loss was enough to make your throat tight and eyes glossy. The feeling was even stronger because you know their past is still present, with people alive today still remembering the memory of Khmer Rougue. People’s parents, aunts and uncles, grandparents having been murdered for a delusional cause and the few survivors that are haunted with the disgusting way of life that once was.

That was only 40 years ago! Can you beleive that?! I didn’t even mention the fact that this was right after being bombed to peices by President Nixon and right before Cambodia had a 14-year long war with Vietnam that lasted until 1991. The United Nations took over Cambodia until 1993 and they have been independently governing their own country ever since. As I’m sure you can tell, Cambodia left quite an impression on us. For once thinking Cambodia was in Africa, I’d say my appreciation and reverence for the country has come along way.

Vietnam: 

Goodmorning Vietnam! As you know, Vietnam has a close to home feeling about it…but in a very strange an unusual way. Before expereincing it myself, I associated Vietnam with war and American pain. Not knowing anyone personally who fought in the Vietnam War, I’d think of tv shows and movies where people would start sentences with, “Well, back in Nam…”,. They’d paint a horrific picture of confusion, violence, and death. Although, the Vietnam War feels like a painful thorn in the American memory the truth is that it was much more painful for the country of Vietnam.

On one of our first day in Saigon (officially Ho Chi Mihn City), we went to the highly reviewed War Remininents Museum in the city center. It’s an amazingly, well-documented, unbiased account of the Vietnam War that covers 3 floors and a few outdoor exhibits. The museum’s exhibits progress from factual timelines to survivor story-telling to award-winning photography. Although LJ and I enjoy history, we didn’t realize how little we knew of the U.S.’s involvement with Vietnam. For those of you who don’t know, the U.S. had troops in Vietnam for 25 years. For many years, the U.S. was the main funding source for the First Indochina War, between Vietnam and France. Then, America did a alot of things and broke a lot of rules and BAM, the Vietnam War began. Obviously, the museum was much more articulate and delicte, but in short that is kind of what happend. As LJ and walked from station to station, which disclosed more and more facts about  America’s ongoing involvement with Vietnam we unknowingly started shaking our heads. What we were reading was truly unbaised information, it was just the cold, hard facts and it was brutal. By the end, I honestly felt like an embarassed American and I contemplated putting on a British accent but then I realized that would definitely be more embarrassing. Then, just when you think it can’t get any worse, you enter the Agent Orange exhibit. Picture after picture after picture of the most unimaginable birth defects and deformities known to mankind. It’s said that 4 million people were exposed and 3 million effected. Today, Vietnam still feels the effect of Agent Orange and the incredible pain it’s caused Vietnamese families. By the time we exited the museum, our brains felt numb. In the course of 3 hours, we absorbed so much new information and our emotions were taken from happy to sad to confused to angry and back again. It was an incredibly catastrophic war for both sides, with 58,000 Americans having died and a staggering total of 2 million Vietnamese, 1.1 million fighting for America. The Defense Department reports that the total cost of the Vietnam War was $173 billion (equivalent of $770 billion in 2003) [cited source].

Well, I sincerely apologize for several depressing paragraphs flooded with boring facts, but when you’re standing on ground where world history was made, it’s hard not to get excited about it. I will end this on a happy note regarding the magnificent island of Cat Bà, Vietnam, which is where I am writing from. Cat Bà is one of 366 islands within 100 square miles that lies on the southeastern edge of Ha Long Bay, Vietnam. It is where LJ and I decided to end our journey and we are so happy that we did because it the most natrually stunning place we’ve been in the past 8 months. It’s like a geological masterpeice of forested mountain after forested mountain, all strung together on one big island. Then, around this big forested mountain island are more forested mountain islands….366 of them to be exact. Yesterday, LJ and I went to the national park and hiked up to one of the highest peaks on the island. The hike was strenous and I started to go cross-eyed for a minute there, due to heat and exhastion, but then we made it to the top. It was so breathtaking and unbeleivable. Honestly, after all of the beautiful things we’ve seen it still amazes me that the earth can continue to shock me with its beauty. As we stood at the top, we could turn 360 degrees and see nothing but forested peaks until we couldn’t see anymore. The air was hot and breezy, and as we looked around us we kept saying, “wow, this is amazing”, “this is so beautiful”. In that moment I couldn’t beleive that  Cat Bà could impress me even more, but today it did. This morning we navigated our way though a fraction of the 366 islands, on a boat, and found an area to kayak. Once we found an area where the waves weren’t of epic propotions, we jumped in a kayak and paddled away. There were so many islands, big and small, that we had to take very specific notes of where we had gone so that we didn’t get lost. The area is like a scene of one of those crazy dreams that you have, where you’re fighting a 4 legged sea monster and you find out you can fly; then you wake up and say something like… “I had the craziest dream last night”. We paddled around islands and we even found a lagoon with water so clear that we could see a huge jelly fish right next to our kayak. We could look in any direction and paddle as far as our arms would take us, and still all we could see was forested mountain islands and monoliths. The island of Cat Bà is a wonder of the world in my book, so stunning with it’s beauty and unique in rock formations and forested mountains. If you get a chance to come, you should do it…you’ll be amazed.

The view from our hotel room in Cat Ba

Hike in Cat Ba

Brewery in Saigon

L and L in Thailand

When my parents initially told me that they wanted to come visit Caroline and I in Thailand I was surprised. I didn’t think my parents would want to spend 20 plus hours on a plane to endure intense heat and humidity. I did not think that they would want to spend their vacation in a place where things are foreign, very different and would surely push them out of their comfort zone. My parents continued to surprise me with their curiosity and open-mindedness. They dove right in to the hectic markets, the sometimes too spicy food and highway motorbiking. And it was “just…so…hot!” L and L not only came to Thailand, but rocked it- making the most of their experiences.

We did a whirlwind tour of the country we called home for 6 months. Starting with sightseeing in Chiang Rai. Then catching sawng tows and getting outdoorsy in Chiang Mai in the north. We snorkeled and motorbiked around the island of Samui and even had a bit of adventure in Bangkok. One of the highlights of the trip was our visit to an Elephant camp that works with rescued elephants. We took part in the care program where we were able to play with young elephants all day, one as young as 2 years old. We were able to interact in a kind and nurturing way with these elephants. We got a chance to feed them sugarcane and bathe them. Everyone had huge smiles on their faces the whole time. It is an experience hat makes you feel warm fuzzies on the inside. The best part was when two of the juvenile males started play fighting one another in the water. They ending up both laying in the water on their sides and kicking each other’s legs. Many of my fights with my younger brother Sam seem to have ended this way, humans and elephants aren’t so different afterall.

Seeing Thailand through my parents eyes was very refreshing. It reminded me of how Caroline and I felt and thought when we first arrived. They noticed many things that I hadn’t or began to take for granted. How kind the people are and how hard farmers work. My parents were both so curious about the history of Thailand and Buddhism in Thailand, particulary my Mom. They enjoyed visiting all of the temples. One of the things my dad noticed were the women who seemed to be very masculine. “Dad, that’s a ladyboy.” Caroline then generously offered to help Dad navigate the world of ladyboys. My Dad would ask, “Is that woman over there a ladyboy?”, and they would have an in depth discussion about transgender people and the ladyboy culture in southeast Asia. We were so excited to share our knowledge with them and have them come to appreciate some of the things we have grown to love. I feel so lucky to have been able to share what Caroline and I know of Thailand with my parents. Having the adventure of a lifetime is fantastic, but its even better when you can share it with those you love.

India & Nepal

We’re back! On the blog that is. We’ve travelled to India, Nepal, and now we’re back in Thailand. We spent 9 days travelling to 4 different cities in India and we spent 9 days travelling to 2 cities in Nepal. Our experience in India was intense, overwhelming, and eye-opening. Our time in Nepal was relaxing, relieving, and filled with natural beauty. It’s difficult to know how to write about all that we saw and experienced in two such unique countries but I will give it a try.

India:

Whew. Where do I start? Well, LJ and I travelled to 4 different cities in Northern India: New Delhi, Jaipur, Agra, and Varanasi; each city had isn’t own charm but all were uniquely Indian. Our first couple of days slapped our sweet-Midwestern selves’ right in the face. We were hassled, lied to, scammed, glared at, and we encountered relentless child begging. Each tuk-tuk ride felt like a game a Russian roulette and the disproportionate amount of men in the street never felt comforting. The sheer amount of people walking and shouting in the road is enough to make your head spin. We quickly learned that the only way to walk in the streets was with your fists clenched, glaring at the ground. If someone tried to talk to us LJ would be as mean as he could be and say, “No thank you” and I would quickly bark, “no!” and look at them like I was mentally deranged. It worked like a charm. Once we started to get the hang of being a tourists in India, we could see what the country had to offer. When we stopped licking our wounds we saw a beauty that was so unique, something we’d never experienced quite before.

India has such an amazing history and gained national independence from the British in 1947. The architecture, food, and prevalence of well-spoken English speaks to the long history of British influence that pervades Indian culture. Although the British have had such an influence on the culture, it’s astounding how intact the culture of India is. Some of my favorite parts of India were the fashion and the food. The beautiful women of India walk around in traditional dress, which includes bright colors and amazing fabrics that drape around their bodies in the most alluring of ways. While looking as beautiful as Indian princesses, they would go about their day and accomplish things with such grace and ease. I saw women carrying bricks and bowls of concrete on their heads while working construction; I saw women caring for 10+ children while picking wheat from the fields; I saw a pregnant women herding groups of goats while carrying a baby on her chest. The women fascinated me. Partly because I knew our worlds were so different and partly because I was curious about a life so uniquely Indian.

The food was mouthwatering. It was so mouthwatering that some nights I would eat two, full dinners. The spices, the potatoes, the vegetables, the masala tea, and most importantly the naan. It all works together to make the most beautiful plate of food that brings a huge smile to my face….and the tea is for LJ. Each night, dinner was our happy place; where we would unwind from the stimulation-overload that is India and word-vomit all of our thoughts and feelings from what we saw during the day. We would talk about the holy cows that Hindus believe is a reincarnation of Vishnu; we would talk of the 15 year old girl who was covered in dirt with a baby on her hip, pounding on our car window for money; we would talk about the dead bodies we saw in the streets of Varanasi; we would talk about the consequences of overpopulation and poverty; we would talk about corruption and how scary it is not to be able to trust the police; but most importantly we talked about what India taught us about ourselves. We joke that we learned more about ourselves than we did about India because the country challenged us in a way we never knew it could. India made us fight, India made him angry, India made me cry though the streets, and India made us question how we handle conflict and the unknown. The experience was full of difficult-to-swallow thoughts, feelings, and emotions but it also helped us appreciate the places we’ve been and the places we’re going to. If you were to ask us now, we’d both say that we’re so grateful to have had the experience to see a place so unique but we’re even happier now that it’s over.

Nepal:

After having an overwhelming and intense experience in India, entering Nepal was like stepping onto a puffy cloud with cookies and milk. There was an absence of people crowding the streets, car horns, and the oppressive heat was nowhere to be found. Although it was different, we were surprised how similar Nepal felt to India at times; women dressed the same, cows in the street, and an overall dust and dirt clouded the air. Although Nepal is believed to be the birthplace of Siddhartha Gautama (i.e. Buddha), 80% of the population identifies as Hindu which is a similar percentage as India. The same religious aura fills time and space: pictures of Hindu gods artistically drawn on buildings, married women painting a red streak down the middle of their head, and the ever-bizarre worshipping of cows (which is believed to be the reincarnation of a major god, Vishnu). Despite the similarities, Nepal had a new a different vibe to it that LJ and I loved. It was relaxed, quite, and people everywhere were in awe at the natural beauty.

After moving from city to city in India, we decided to only spend time in two places in Nepal: Kathmandu and Pokhara. Kathmandu feels like a big city, with a population of 1 million there are people running around and stores and shops everywhere. It is definitely not your average big city though, seeing as it is home to 7 World Heritage sights. Unfortunately, we didn’t spend that much time in Kathmandu but we did see the famous Boudhanath Stupa. It was built in the 14^th century and it is the holiest Tibetan Buddhist temple outside of Tibet. Today it remains an important place for pilgrimage and meditation for both Tibetans and Nepalese people and while visiting it you could feel its importance. There were old and young, praying and worshiping. Monks circling the monument in peace, meditation, and reverence for the history and culture that encompasses their faith and beliefs.

We spent the rest of our time exploring the beautiful grounds of Nepal. It quickly became an active vacation, filled with kayaking, hiking, rafting, trekking, and biking. LJ and I took 2 days out of our stay to take a small trek to the Australian Base Camp, which was about 30 km from where we were staying. We had no idea what we were getting into and we did it without a guide, because we apparently deemed ourselves savvy enough to trek foreign lands on our own. We hiked from village to village and for hours at a time we would climb up, up, up. It was kind of like being on a Stairmaster at level 10 with no end in sight. The temperature was about 65 degrees and we dripping with sweat and our legs were shaky. Our shaky legs finally got us to the base camp where we stayed for the night. The air was damp and clouds would roll through our camp in such an eerie way. All of a sudden you could barely see what was in front of you; we were so high up. We woke up at sunrise to hopefully catch a glimpse of the Annapurna range of the Himalayas. Although the clouds came through by 5:45am, we were able to catch a breathtaking sight. Unlike the days before where we saw the mountain range, this time they felt so close it was like you could reach out and touch them. These massive mountain peaks with the early morning sun making the snow caps glisten and sparkle. We sat there in silence, knowing that this was one of the most beautiful things we’d ever seen and the experience intensified because we knew it wouldn’t last. Within minutes the clouds came rolling in and the mountain peaks were covered. Being in Nepal felt like a surreal experience at times. The beauty of the Himalayas can leave you staring, starry-eyed and breathless. It reminds you that nature connects us all and to feel its beauty is rejuvenating.

LJ and I flew out of Kathmandu 12 hours before the 7.9 magnitude earthquake hit. When we read the news, we were in such disbelief. We had that look on our faces as if someone told us the sky is actually purple and not blue. We couldn’t believe it. We kept saying to each other, “but we were just there…”, “Oh god, I hope [insert name] is okay”, “Remember that man who helped us, I hope he is alive…”. Just 24 hours before, we were whitewater rafting at the epicenter of the earthquake. We stopped for lunch in a village at the epicenter, we ate sandwiches and LJ was playing with a baby goat. To be so close to a tragedy of epic proportions has given us an indescribable feeling. We feel so lucky that it makes us feel a bit sick to our stomachs. As we continue to read the news and watch the death toll rise, we feel a sadness for the people of Nepal and the country as a whole. So much of their economy depends on tourism and it will be a long road to recovery. Our time there was so amazing and I can’t speak more highly of the people, the culture, and the natural beauty. The memories we made there will always be with me and as the country continues to rebuild itself I can only hope the people of Nepal keep faith in their awe-inspiring, gut-wrenchingly beautiful country.

Nepal – Trekking

India – Ganges

India – Ganges

India – Ganges

Nepal – Pokhara

Nepal – World Peace Pagoda

Nepal – Trekking

Nepal – Sunrise

India – Amber Fort

India – Amber Fort

India – Monkey Temple

India – Taj Mahal

India – Taj Mahal

India – Baby Taj

India – Henna

India

Nepal – Himalayas

Nepal – Kayaking

Nepal – Trekking

Nepal – Trekking

Nepal – Trekking

Nepal – LJ & Baby goat

Nepal – White water rafting

Nepal – Trekking

 

Reflections: Thailand

I have that feeling when the pages of your story book are turning and you are about to start a new chapter in your life; when you savor every moment because you know it may be the last time you experience something. It’s a time of reflection on the experiences we’ve had here; how nervous we were when we arrived and how much we’ve adapted to what once scared us. We’ve adjusted to a new job, a new language, a new home, a new climate, and inconveniences as the rule, not the exception: relying on others for transportation, squat toilets, no air conditioning in 101 degree heat, communicating with pigeon-English, no shoes in your size (anywhere), feeling sick for reasons unknown, and mosquito bites as your new accessory. There have been challenges small and large but in return the rewards have been greater than we could have imagined.

Although LJ and I arrived in Ngao only 5 months ago, it feels like it’s been much longer. We consider certain things about Thai culture as comfortable and enjoyable. We feel like we’ve learned some life lessons along the way and we’re certain that we’ve grown in ways we don’t yet understand. Even though our journey is not over, we will be leaving our home away from home, Ngao, for the last time. From there, LJ will go on a solo camping trip and I will go to a meditation retreat at a monastery. After we’ve each found our “happy place”, we’ll head to India, Nepal, back to Thailand, Cambodia, and finally Vietnam. We are so grateful to have the experience to travel Asia and to have had the experience to consider Thailand our new home. Below we’ve written some things we’ve learned over the past 5 months.

Caroline:

Sleeping on a rock hard bed for 5 months gives you back problems; kindness translates in every culture; smiles can get you everywhere; whatever your job or career, you will feel discontentment at times; stray dogs are amazing; stray dogs are terrifying; Buddhism is a wonderful religion; laughing is appropriate in every situation; don’t be so serious, it’s probably not that bad; Thais love America; Thais can be overtly racist; it’s easier to change a situation than it is to change your perspective; fatty pork doesn’t taste good; you can eat too much rice; being comfortable with yourself is valued everywhere; being social makes your life more enjoyable; Thai babies are less angsty than American babies; you can live without teflon pans; being focused isn’t universally valued; being serious makes Thais uncomfortable; traveling with someone you love makes you love them even more; not everyone in the world loves cheese; red ant eggs are a delicacy; sweeping the floor can be an art form; your biggest problems mostly live in your mind; being positive can drastically change a situation

LJ:

Life in Thailand has been challenging in unexpected ways. Learning how to navigate, order food, shop and the basics of life are easy. Language barriers, culture fatigue, miscommunications, waiting, and feeling like no one ever takes things seriously were challenges. Smiles bring out a kindness in people that may not have existed if not for the simple, gentle act of friendliness. Figuring out another culture can be like solving an impossible riddle. When you learn about the language, food, history, and religion of a culture you get hints that allows you to get a fuzzy picture, but you will never see it clearly.

Kings are still a thing here; freedom of speech is not. I will never forget the random acts of kindness. I learned to really enjoy the actual teaching part of being a classroom teacher. My students were frustrating at times, hilarious at times, but always happy. I have learned to be comfortable being uncomfortable. Awkwardness is inevitable when living in another country, so I learned to embrace it. Being happy is so important to Thais. I have learned to value my own happiness more, and most of the time what makes me happy makes others happy. I will always cherish this experience because I was able to do it with the woman I love. I am so lucky to have had her to share my thoughts, feelings and frustrations.

Ancient Empire National Park

Our kitchen in Ngao

Bedroom in Ngao

Tiger tamer

Riding in a Sawng Taew

Impromptu Christmas speeches

The King (all Thais have his picture in the home)

Traditional Thai Soup

Motorbiking in Pai

A pondering badger

Kayaking in Kho Phi Phi

Sunsets

Crazy man

Bird watching

Laos and Myanmar over our shoulders

Meghan & Chuck visiting

Selfies while fine dining

Recently in Thailand

B-ball with the Locals

I have been playing basketball a few days a week with some of the local guys and some of my students since mid-November. I love playing with them. I don’t love it just because I am super tall and now know what Yao Ming must have felt like. I don’t love it just because every time someone pulls off a great shot or block or move the game stops so everyone can scream. Usually everyone yells “oh my God!” or “ooohhhhhh!” and the player yells out the name of an NBA player. “Yaooooooo!” for blocks. “Koooobbbbeeee!” for a nice jumper. “Leeee bron!” for a strong move to the basket. I got them saying “Steeeeeve Nash!” for a nice pass and “Curry!” for a splash three. They also say “made in the U.S.A.!!!!!” when I hit a three or block a shot. I love playing basketball here because I am able to relate to a group of Thai guys without really speaking. We communicate all the time, but I do not feel the language isolation that exists in other social situations. I feel like I belong to this group like I have belonged to other teams in the past. We joke, we celebrate each other’s successes and we compete.

I can tell that it is time for me to move on though. Recently the temperature has been getting extremely hot and it does not cool off in the evenings. The humidity is also increasing, which leads me to sweat a truly copious amount when I am playing basketball. I sweat through anything and everything I am wearing within the first fifteen minutes. I sweat so much that other players do not want to guard me in the post and will move out of the way to avoid body contact. And the Thais barely break a sweat! I do not understand how their bodies can deal with the heat and humidity without sweating and they do not take water breaks while I guzzle down 2 liters every time we play. It is time to move on, my body can no longer deal, but it was real.

Attack of the Jungle Dogs

Thai dogs hate tall white men on bicycles. This is a ridiculous statement, but the longer I live here the more I think it is true. There are definitely some Thai dogs that like me, but the majority of the dogs in Ngao are not fond of my presence. Every day when I walk into school there are three dogs that wait at the entrance. When they first see me they start off with small muffled barks and then start howling as I walk past them. They never bark at Caroline or anyone else. I had come to expect this and I was generally accepting that the dogs here were all bark and no bite. Then came the attack of the jungle dogs.

It was Scout Day, so naturally we didn’t have class and we were wandering around town doing random tasks with the Girl Guides (Thailand’s Girl Scouts). The final tasks were team-building activities at a farm owned by Sam, our coordinator’s husband. All-in-all it was a very fun day, up until I had to bike by myself back to our house to get Caroline. Caroline and I were spilt up taking pictures and videos for the school. Caroline went home for lunch and I left Sam’s farm to go find her and lead her through the backcountry roads to the farm.

I was casually biking along some dirt roads and took a left around a corner. In the middle of the road were two small dogs. As I pedaled towards them they just sat there, right in my way. I veered clear of them and as I passed they suddenly erupted into furious barking and began chasing me. As they started chasing me I started to see the grass and bamboo moving unnaturally. I knew something was coming, but I could not imagine that it would be 10+ huge dogs with their teeth bared, barking like savages. I felt like I was in a scene from the movie Jumangi with a bunch of terrifying jungle creatures bearing down on me! This scared the crap out of me and I began to pedal as fast as I could, but I was on an old 1 speed. They caught up and started nipping at my heels. I kicked a few and kept pedaling. Eventually they stopped chasing. I have never felt so scared in my life; with adrenaline running through me I saw Caroline and told her we had to go back to the house. I had to sit down. We called a fellow teacher to come get us to go back to the farm. When I returned I told the teachers what had happened and they laughed and laughed. They said if you stop pedaling they will stop chasing. I call bologna, these dogs wanted to taste some farang.

Karaoke Bus from Hell

Karaoke and bus sounds kinda fun at first. I love karaoke and it seems like a little bit of fun singing could help break up the monotony of a long bus ride. Adding some drinking into this mix could be even better. This long boring bus ride could be like a fun karaoke bar night. A party on wheels! This logic is wrong. So, so, so wrong. Karaoke buses are the worst. Let me tell you a story.

This past week we went on a trip with our entire school staff. Maintenance people, administrators, teachers, everyone who works at our school were packed onto two buses for a three night, two day excursion to explore the area southwest of Bangkok. The company that produces the notebooks the students use invited us to stay at their “hotel”. The hotel turned out to be abandoned workers quarters in the company’s factory headquarters (I slept on the floor). The night we stayed there Caroline and I competed in a super embarrassing beach couple competition, ate some very questionable seafood, and drank lots of whiskey. Other than that we saw two floating markets and spent some time at the beach. But I am getting off track because this story is about the karaoke bus from hell.

We were gone from Ngao for 66 hours; 45 of those hours were spent on the bus with a 15-minute food and bathroom break every 3 hours. Those other activities were just quick stops. 45 hours on a bus does not seem that bad, but this was 45 hours on a karaoke bus blaring Thai karaoke music. When I saw blaring I mean so loud that your body shakes, it takes intense focus to even think and you feel as though someone is violating your mind. We could not even hear the few TV shows we put on our tablets with ear buds in and the volume all the way up. Thais absolutely love karaoke. They love karaoke as a whole in the way that UW students love football, an insane amount. There was always someone singing, even at 2 A.M. The volume was never turned down. Most of the singers were those drinking whiskey non-stop, but some were simply drunk on karaoke. People were up out of their seats dancing and singing along nearly the entire time. I hated it, but I was also amazed by the stamina. No one in the states can compete with this sort of undying devotion to karaoke. In addition they rotated through the same 30 songs, with 10 being repeated a particularly frequent amount. It was maddening, yet beautiful.

Caroline and I could not sleep, could barely think and were starting to go deaf. Everyone else was loving the karaoke so much that we stopped multiple times on the side of the road because the karaoke computer wasn’t working properly. We waited for over an hour and a half for another bus to come at a pit stop because the battery that runs the electronics on our bus had been drained from all the non-stop karaoke. We were only 3 hours from Ngao at that point and it was 6 AM. We did not arrive until 12:30 because we stopped to fix the karaoke machine or just stopped so we would have more time on the bus because everyone else was having so much fun. It was hell for us, the Filipino teacher and a few Thai teachers, but heaven for everyone else. I will never again ride on a karaoke bus and I will never forget those songs, permanently echoing in my skull. I will be forever in awe of the karaoke greatness of the Thais. I thought I was hardcore into karaoke, but I am simply an amateur.

Friends Around the World

The past few weeks we have had a few visitors from back home and their presence was wonderful. Caroline’s sister and brother, Meghan and Chuck visited, as well as our friends Christie and her brother Blake and TJ. I was on the same school team, the David and Julia Uihlein Charitable Foundation Team at Alexander Mitchell Integrated Schools of the Arts, with Christie at City Year in Milwaukee. Yes that is an incredibly long team name that we always had to say when introducing ourselves to those outside of City Year. Christie and her brother, Blake, are ESL teachers in Taiwan. TJ was one of my co-workers while I worked at Nature’s Classroom last year. He is doing some serious backpack traveling around southeast Asia and spent time in Vietnam and Cambodia before meeting up with us for a weekend.

We met Christie and Blake in Chiang Mai and had a great time showing them a city we have come to enjoy so much. They were visiting Thailand because they had time off from teaching in Taiwan for Chinese New Year. Caroline and I learned a lot about Taiwan from them. Their experience teaching has been very different from ours. In Taiwan, school is just a lot more serious and structured than in Thailand. We compared the cultures and the food. Christie and Blake love Thai food, so they were having a great time with us. It was so great to be able to talk to other people who understood our situation very well, but also had a very different perspective. It made me feel lucky to have the opportunity to live and teach in Thailand.

We saw TJ in a town called Phayao, about 45 minutes north of our town. Phayao is very unique because it is located on a huge marshy lake called Kwan Phayao and there is a University there. It is a really cool mix of traditional Thai culture mixed with young Thai culture with a little bit of western tourism sprinkled in. There are loads of bars and restaurants. We took off on mopeds around the lake and ate along the way. We really enjoyed talking to TJ about his travels and about our views of Thailand. We met up with a few other teacher friends at night and had a great time drinking and eating delicious Thai food. Caroline and I feel so lucky to have been able to meet up with some people from back home.

TJ!

At a random school on our bus journey

Wat Chedi Luang with Christie

On the bus with Tanitta

Girls Guides

Girl Guides

One of the several embarassing Beach couple activities

Thai Food

Aroy Mak! It translates to “very delicious” and it’s a phrase commonly used when eating Thai food. Native dishes often include things like: chili paste, fish sauce, oyster sauce, lime, sugar, pepper flakes, bean noodles, rice noodles, rice, vegetables, and meat. Some combination of these ingredients usually gives you breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Needless to say, a Thai diet is different than an American diet and it takes some getting used to. In Ngao, there is one shop that serves something other than Thai food. Although they market it as “pizza”, I wouldn’t necessarily call undercooked dough with ketchup, peculiar looking cheese, and crab stick toppings a pizza. So, I think we can agree they only serve Thai food in our town and most food carts and restaurants offer similar dishes. If you’re a foreigner you probably should learn the phrase, “mai ped”, which means “not spicy” because you might start sweating profusely and tearing up; LJ and I can speak from experience.

There are many things that are different about food culture in Thailand, compared to America. As we’ve mentioned before, there is usually food everywhere and people snack and eat all day long. Most mornings at school, teachers flood the office with food like: chicken legs, a freshly grilled fish, fermented fish, a fruit dish with chili peppers, a pineapple, curry with pork, ect. Thai’s don’t eat different types of food for breakfast, it’s usually the same thing they’d eat for lunch and dinner. They eat fruit and vegetables often and they use all of the food resources around them. For example, they eat leafy dark greens that grow in their backyard and these little, bitter-as-hell green things that grow on trees everywhere. They eat flowers from the ground and they’ll say, “CC, sweet, like candy, try, try”. They’re good but it’s not bag of Sour Patch Kids.

Eating a Thai diet has been a big adjustment for me but less of an adjustment for LJ. He is the golden child who devours ant eggs, black chicken eggs, and pork that is 50% meat, 50% fat. I am the pouty princess in the corner who secretly makes PB&J sandwiches when no one is looking. I enjoy a lot of Thai dishes but eating like the small town, country locals is difficult at times. The concept of not wanting to eat something because it’s psychologically upsetting, or “gross” is an unfamiliar idea to them. The only things that they could think of that makes them “uneasy” to eat sometimes was cheese. Oh, the irony.

Below are some local dishes that we (sometimes only LJ) eat. The descriptions are taken from Wikipedia.org.

1. Namphrik Pla – Fish Chili Sauce– Namphrik pla or fish chili sauce can be a little thick or thin depending on the amount of liquid from the boiling fish one puts in it. Grilled fish can be used instead of boiled fish. Any kinds of fresh chilies can be used from mild to the hottest kinds to suit one’s taste.
2. 2. Kai mod daeng – Ant Eggs – clean and high in protein nutrients. Red ants eat mango leaves so their bodies taste like a squirt of lime, but their fresh eggs are fatty and sweet.
3. Nam tok – Pork with chilies – made with pork (mu) or beef (nuea) and somewhat identical to lap, except that the pork or beef is cut into thin strips rather than minced.
4. Som tam – Grated green papaya salad, pounded with a mortar and pestle, similar to the Lao tam mak hoong. There are three main variations: som tam pu with pickled rice-paddy crab, and som tam Thai with peanuts, dried shrimp and palm sugar and som tam pla ra from the northeastern part of Thailand (Isan), with salted gourami fish, white eggplants, fish sauce and long beans. Som tam is usually eaten with sticky rice but a popular variation is to serve it with khanom chin (rice noodles) instead.
5. Kaep mu- Deep fried crispy pork rinds which often eaten with chili pastes such asnam phrik num but also eaten as a snack on their own.
6. Khanom chinnam ngiao– Fermented rice noodles with pork blood – A specialty of Northern Thailand, it is Thai fermented rice noodles served with pork blood tofu and raw vegetables, in a sauce made with pork broth and tomato, crushed fried dry chilies, chicken blood, dry fermented soy bean, and dried redkapok flowers.
7. Khao soi– Curry with chicken legs – curried noodle soup enriched with coconut milk (traditionally a novel ingredient in the cooking traditions of northern Thailand), garnished with crispy fried wheat noodles, and served with pickled cabbage, lime, a chili paste, and raw shallots on the side.
8. Century Egg – Preserved egg – traditionally a Chinese dish but often eaten in Thailand. Preserving a duck, chicken, or quail egg in a mixture of clay, ash, salt, quicklime, and rice hulls for several weeks to several months. Through the process, the yolk becomes a dark green/black with a creamy consistency. Usually eaten with vegetables and rice.
9. Fruits: tamarind, papaya, jackfruit, mango, rose apples, durian, lychees, coconut
10. Vegtables: eggplant, long beans, cauliflower, bean sprouts, bamboo shoots, tomatoes, cucumbers, Chinese kale, corn, morning glory (leafy green), pennywort, water mimosa, Chinese cabbage, rice paddy herb, yellow burr head, mushroom

Various dishes

Very bitter tree vegetable

Various dishes

Century egg and basil

Ant egg with vegetables

Pork

Tamarind

 

Meghan and Chuck Do Thailand

This week we had a 4 day hiatus from life in Ngao and instead spent our time with family. My sister, Meghan, and my brother-in-law, Chuck, came to Thailand for a 2 week vacation. They arrived late on a Thursday and spend the following day in Bangkok. Next stop: Northern Thailand. They came to Chiang Mai and met us at the guesthouse on Saturday afternoon. I was sitting in our room at the guesthouse when I heard familiar voices; “so she is in her room? Okay, Okay, great. Khap khew cowww!”. I ran out of the room as fast as I could and saw those two loveable Americans standing in the lobby. I literally jumped with excitement and hugged them as tight as I possibly could. I turned to Meghan and said, “you know that’s not how you say ‘thank you’ in Thai right?”. She laughed and said jokingly, “Well that’s how Kristen Wigg says it in Bridesmaids”. That’s when I realized how much I missed my sister. After we impersonated the movie, Bridesmaids, for a few minutes her and Chuck told us about their day in Bangkok. It sounded like only a day you could have in a foreign country and maybe only in Thailand. They stumbled across a tuk-tuk driver who offered to take them anywhere they wanted all day for 100 THB, or $3 USD. Even in Thailand, that is dirt cheap. They proceeded to cruise around town and somehow ended up at an Armani suit sale that the driver insisted they go to. It was a one-day deal that would probably never happen again; they were selling personally tailored suits and tailored wool coats for half-price. Needless to say, Meghan and Chuck were thrown into the randomness and generosity that only Thailand can offer.

Once we had settled in, we went to Wat Doi Suthep, which is the temple on the side of a mountain outside Chiang Mai. The grounds of the temple are beautiful and there is an overlook that gives a great view of the city. Afterward, we went to the famous Saturday night walking street that is about 1.5-2 miles long. It has stand after stand of hand-made crafts, clothes, and food. LJ and I continued to show Chuck and Meghan different foods and desserts that are commonly found in the markets and naturally we ended up painfully full by the end of the night. At one point, I had fried donuts in my pocket and a hot, chocolate waffle stuffed with a banana inside in my hand. That’s when I thought, “maybe I’ve overindulged?”. On Sunday, LJ and Chuck went to a 7 hour cooking class while Meghan and I strolled around the city. Meghan and I caught up on life and saw some attractions in Chiang Mai. Once we all reunited we did the only thing that one wants at 5pm on a Sunday: massages. LJ and I got foot massages and Meghan and Chuck got Thai massages. For those of you who aren’t familiar, Thai massages can be intense. In my experience, when the Thai woman has her elbow dug into my back that’s when I find myself making some awkward noise that is a mix between pain and relief. She usually says, “you okay? In pain?”. The truth is, I can’t tell if it’s actually painful or just all part of the process. So, I’ve given up and usually stick with the foot massages.

On Monday, we travelled to Chiang Rai which is the largest, northern city in Thailand. The population is around 70,000 but it sees quite a few tourist throughout the year. We planned an all-day tour around the city and surrounding areas to see attractions, and it was absolutely fabulous. Our tour started with a longboat ride down the river to an elephant camp. We cruised past small towns and villages that have built up around the water and saw children and families wading down the river; it all felt very small-town Thai. We arrived at the elephant camp and had a blast feeding the elephants. In person, they are so big and magnificent. Their club feet look so funny in person and the hair on their body is so course. When you feed them bananas they wrap it around the tip of their trunk and wind their trunks into their mouth. It seems odd to call such a large animal adorable, but that is exactly what they are. Our next stop was the famous White Temple, which our tour guide, Tony, knew a lot about. Tony went to University for tourism; it’s a degree that focuses on learning English as well as understanding all of the attractions around Thailand. Afterward, we went to the Black House which was fascinating. It is the estate of a famous Thai artist that died a few years ago. Apparently there are 40 buildings in total on his estate, but only a handful are open to the public. The artist claims that much of his inspiration was from death and the afterlife, which explains why he has entire buildings filled with animal skulls and crocodile skins. It is not everyone’s cup of tea, but for many you can see the beauty in it all. By walking through the houses, you can see what he found inspiring and you feel the mad-genius vibe all around you.

We ended our tour at the Karen Long-neck Village. The most common theory for the women wearing rings around their neck was to prevent inter-village marriage or procreation. They used the rings as a mark to make it clear which tribe the Karen women belonged to and the rings are seen as a mark of beauty; it’s a practice they still use today. Unlike other hill tribes in Thailand, they make their living on tourism and do not have much else. The Karen village is a refugee group from Myanmar and like many refugees, they face a lot of political and social justice issues. We all agreed that it was experience we enjoyed having but that it left us a bit sad. As you walk around their community, the woman have hand-made goods outside their houses and I bought quite a few carvings and drawings. I enjoyed supporting their craft but it was another instance where I felt a great deal of gratitude for my own life. Of course, exhausted, we ended our night early with some wine and Thai food. Meghan and Chuck said that they were glad we made the trek to Chiang Rai because they got a better appreciation for small-town Thai culture and life.

On our last day we went to the National Park, Doi Inthanon. It is the highest point in Thailand and it offers a cooler breeze and cleaner air than the city. We saw the pagodas that were built for the King and Queen on their 60^th birthday and we also witnessed a breath-taking waterfall. As the day came to a close we found the three necessities for a night in Thailand: food, drink, and massages. I was so sad so say goodbye to Chuck and Meghan but I was also so grateful that they visited us on their journey. I know they had a lot of fun and they were fabulous travel buddies. It was nice for LJ and I to be with familiar faces and to speak in our native tongue for a full 4 days. Before Meghan and Chuck came, my mom said to me, “Caroline, you will cherish this memory for a long time. When’s the next time you’ll be across the world with your sister!?”. My mom isn’t always right, but in this instance she definitely was. So, as life goes on, and Meghan and I are walking with canes and drinking wine in the middle of the afternoon, I hope we can laugh about our time together and the funny memories we made in Thailand.

Elephant camp

Chuck

The Black House

Karen Longneck Village

Doi Inthanon

Chiang Mai

River boat cruise

Doi Suthep

Black House

Doi Inthanon

Doi Inthanon

Traditional Thai dress

The Students

Many of our experiences in Thailand have revolved around teaching. Caroline and I have spent much of our time planning, teaching and talking about our students. Some of them were fantastic, some were mischievous, and all of them could laugh hysterically, at the drop of a hat. This week is finals week for the students. Even though Caroline and I are going to be at school until the end of March doing administrative work, the school will be void of students. We will miss them and we want to share a little bit about some of our most memorable students and classes.

Mattayom 6/7- Boys Club

LJ: All of my students in Mattayom 6/7 are boys. They are fairly rowdy and do not really care that much about school. Many of their classmates had already dropped out by the time that I began teaching them. These guys loved to laugh and they loved to have fun; an incredibly boisterous, stupid teenage boy sort of fun. So naturally this was my favorite class. Every morning they would shout “Good Morning Teacha!” at a volume that seemed to shake the room. So I took the chance to raise my voice and shout “Good Morning Class!” I have no idea why but this incredibly loud greeting everyday made everyone crack up, every single time. Anytime I attempted a silly joke or if I spoke Thai they would die laughing. Some students would fall out of their chairs! I know I am not that funny, but damn their laughter made me feel like a stand-up legend.

I learned quickly that if these guys were not entertained they would quickly begin using their phones and then I would just be locked in a power struggle all class. So I began teaching them differently than all my other classes. I put students on the spot and made them speak English, especially if they were not paying attention. And I always tried to learn a little Thai or had them teach me a little Thai. On one of the last days of class I had learned how to write some Thai words. As I was close to finishing the first word the class started pounding their desks and yelling in anticipation. “Ohhhhhhhhhh!” When I finished writing and stepped away from the board they all screamed out the word I had written, “Lampang!” Some of the them stood up and began clapping. This continued as I wrote the name of the town we are from, my name and the name of the school. We barely shared a language, but we shared many moments like these. We laughed together, we shared in each other’s small triumphs and I will miss them.

Sittichai aka The Walking Skeleton

LJ: Sittichai is a Mattayom 6/5 student who also happens to be the tallest student in school. Based on my observations he is also the skinniest student. He is so freaky skinny and tall that he really does look like a walking skeleton. Aside from his physical stature (I could definitely sympathize since I was just the American version of Sittichai in high school) Sitticahi also was the class clown. At least he tried to be. He would always try to speak with me in Thai or try to get me to say something inappropriate, but I knew his game. I messed up around Thanksgiving when I was giving a lesson about Thanksgiving.

I was trying to describe the incredible depths of fullness that many Americans find themselves in after this incredible feast. A few days earlier I learned a Thai word that perfectly describes this sensation. “Gut”. You say it just like the less formal English word for stomach and it means that you are so incredibly full that you cannot take another bite. If you say this word to another person it means that you feel like there is food filling your entire body and that you might explode. So I stuck my belly out and said that I feel very “gut” after Thanksgiving and I danced around a bit. This had the whole class rolling. I loved it, but there was an unintended consequence. Every time I met with that class or say Sittichai at school or around town yells, “Guuuuuuuttttttt gut! Teacha, guuuuuutttt gut!” I used to be annoyed, but now it is like our inside joke and I play along by sticking out my stomach and laughing.

Narissara and Kuntaros

LJ: My 6/1 and 2/1 classes were by far my most advanced classes. Despite the age difference I could actually get these students to have conversations in English. I actually felt like I was seeing progress with these students, mainly because they could do the basics; understand directions and build upon concepts they were previously taught. I loved teaching these classes because the students had a genuine intellectual curiosity and a solid English background that allowed us to do things I could not have in other classes. I could actually communicate and learn about the student’s lives. I enjoyed many of the students from these two classes, but my favorites were two girls that came after-school for extra tutoring, Narissara and Kuntaros.

Both of these girls are in 6/1. I had offered extra English practice after school for all of the students in 6/1-6/5, but only Narissara and Kuntaros showed up. They were incredibly shy, but after a few sessions they began opening up. We talked about their families, politics, their professional aspirations, and how excited they were to be leaving Ngao to go to University. Kuntaros’s mother and Narissara’s father are both farmers and Kuntaros’s father lives in Chiang Mai during the week for work. Both understand that their parents give up a lot for them to succeed in school and they make the most of it. They both want to be teachers. Kuntaros wants to become a physics teacher and Narissara wants to be an art teacher. She is a great artist and painted Caroline and I a beautiful picture. I was very touched when Narissara, Kuntaros and some of the other 6/1 girls came into our office on their graduation day and offered us a blessing for our future and thanked us for coming to Ngao to be teachers.

The Notorious 2/3

CC: This class is nothing short of maddening. I have described them as small hamsters that suffer from psychosis. They are notorious throughout our department for being crazy and no one wants to teach them. I walk into most classes with these students jumping on desks, rolling on the floor and throwing things out the window. To top it off, their English is quite awful. I ask them to sit down, take out a piece of paper or to simply listen to me and most students in 2/3 will laugh hysterically in my face. Not necessarily because they’re being disrespectful but because they really think me speaking English is hilarious. Each time I taught 2/3 I would feel defeated and sometimes I thought I’d lost my mind. Ironically yet appropriately, the last class I taught was 2/3 and of course they were in rare form. They were screaming, jumping, hitting, and dancing outside the classroom. I got so desperate for them to sit down in their seats that I started begging them to “please come in the classroom”. They were so hyper and indifferent toward learning English on their last day of class that I literally had to beg them; 5 more seconds and I may have gotten on my knees. When the class was over, I swear the sky parted and I could hear Hallelujahs and angels dancing in the sky. All 34 of them ran out of the classroom screaming, yelling, and cheering. One kid even tipped over a desk, because why not? Teaching 2/3 was pretty insane and it taught me to never underestimate the energy and absurdity of an 8th grade class.

Sittichai- The Little Elephant

I have never met anyone like Sittichai and I will probably never meet anyone like him again. He is my favorite student because of his unique personality and the fact that I think he is hilarious. He usually greets me by kicking his foot in the air and doing a full body dance; “Teachaaa, hii, it’s meeee, little elephant!”. As we’ve mentioned Ladyboys are an accepted 3rd gender in Thailand. They are biological boys who have adopted the identity of a woman or a homosexual man dressing as a woman. Our school has a disproportionate amount of Ladyboys, compared to other schools, and LJ and I love it. Both LJ and I have more than 20-30 Ladyboy students, and they each deliver a different spice to the classroom. Some Ladyboys are rather discrete and do not exude a flamboyance that others do. Some are thin and have very feminine features and some are like Sittichai. Sittichai is 17 years old and he is in 11th grade. He is probably 5’5 and weighs 200 lbs. For Thai standards he is ginormous and that is why they have given him the nickname, Little Elephant. He has acne and his facial hair is sparse but long and stringy. By most opinions, he is not very attractive. He speaks with a voice of seduction; a seductively soft and high-pitched voice. Big hairy man, sexy lady voice. He usually walks on his tippy-toes and does a little twirl every few steps. If he hears music, he does a few pelvic thrusts and screams in a high pitch voice. Since Ladyboy culture is normative in Thailand, most people don’t look twice at Sittichai’s behavior, but I personally can’t get enough.

On the last day, I had my classes have a conversation between two students in front of my desk as I graded them. As two students were conversing, I heard someone seductively yell, “Ohhhh Teachaaaaaaa”. When I looked between the two students standing in front of me, I saw Sittichai directly in front of my desk, about 10 feet away from me. He was staring so intensely at me as he seductively twirled. Sittichai was literally dancing to his own tune, as he moved his hands through the air and thrust his gut as he danced. At this point his stomach was half out of his shirt and he was jiggling his body. I looked around to see if anyone else thought this was insane as I did. No one even flinched. It’s just Sittichai being Sittichai. I laughed and told Sittichai that he could dance for me another time. I apologetically asked the students to start their conversation again, as I could not focus. Sittichai walks to the beat of his own drummer and I will miss him so dearly.

The Daily Grind

Some of you may be wondering what our day-to-day lives are like in Thailand. I remember before we came here, I was always wondering, “but what will it be like most days?”. It’s shocking how easily and naturally you can get into a “routine”; that daily phenomenon where you spend a lot of time on autopilot. You wake up, make your coffee, check your emails, you’re always hungry post-breakfast around 10am, always let your class before lunch out a little early, usually uncomfortably hot around 1pm, need coffee at 2pm, restless by 3pm….

I honestly thought that by moving half way across the world, my mindsets would completely change, my routines be turned on their head, and I would live a life I might not recognize. For the most part, my predications were wrong. We are creatures of habit, routine, and structure. Our lives definitely aren’t the same as in America, but we have adopted routines here that look very similar to our American routines. We go through our week with ups and downs; wake up and go to bed at the same time, eat similar things each day, have a few unexpected surprises at work, exercise, see co-workers outside of school, and countdown until the weekend begins.

Here is a typical Tuesday:

7:00 am – Wake up

7:50am – Get to school and sign in

8:00-8:30 – School assembly/announcements

8:30-9:20 – LJ teaches 12^th graders (M 6/3) and I teach 9^th graders (M3/1)

9:20-11:10 – Free periods; usually email, lesson plan, Skype, blog, ect. Often times, something random is thrown into the mix; such as, attempting to assemble a desktop computer for reasons unknown, doing crafts for a school fair in which classes will be cancelled, paying tribute to the King for 2 hours because why not?, visiting the local temple ,ect.

11:10- 12:00 – Scheduled to teach but instead students will set up decorations for an upcoming village-wide festival.

12:00-1:00 – Eat lunch in the English Office. Usually 5-7 teachers cook traditional Thai food in the office and we eat for about 30-45 minutes.

1:00 – 1:50 – Cleaning up lunch, washing dishes, sweeping, feeding stray dogs

1:50 – 3:30 – LJ and I teach a mix of 8^th, 11^th, and 12^th graders

3:30 – 4:30 – Finish up any pending work and do random tasks for teachers. For example, we will edit exams for other English teachers to make sure their English is correct and that what they are teaching makes sense and is relevant.

4:30 – Home

4:30 – 6:30 – Go to the market and get dinner. The market sells mainly raw meat and vegetables. Also, there are many food carts that sell prepared food.  Most days I take a run around Ngao and LJ plays basketball with men in town.

7:00 – 8:00 – Eat dinner and clean up

8:00 – 10:30 – Watch TV, read, shower, ect.

So, as you can see our lives aren’t exactly riveting on a Monday through Friday basis. On the weekends we usually go to one of four bigger cities in Northern Thailand. We usually see other American teachers and spend the weekends eating out, exploring nature, staying in hotels, and soaking up the culture. The weekends can be riveting at times and are usually quite wonderful. Our weekdays are pretty low-key and are usually filled with odd requests from teachers, indecipherable English from students and locals, and spending time decompressing with LJ.